This list is sponsored by Chesterfields: nothing says smooth like a hit from a cocaine-laced Chesterfield cigarette...which is what you're on if you enjoy these episodes. Although the Twilight Zone is known for timeless classics and legendary stories, there were unfortunate episodes that make you realize why the show was cancelled...twice. Whether the episode was bad from a technical standpoint or was incoherent from start to finish, these are the stories that serve as a blemish on TZ's glorious legacy. Once more, if you're curious about any particular episode you can check out my full reviews for each. Finally, these are my personal opinions, and, if you have a problem with that, I'm sure there's a "safe space" at some college to seek comfort in. Now, without further ado, I present the worst episodes of the Twilight Zone!
Dishonorable Mentions (in order):
Elegy (Season 1, episode 20) - The first legitimately bad episode in the series. The plot is predictable and overshadowed by shoddy camerawork involving the supposedly dead extras.
The Arrival (Season 3, Episode 2) - Starts off incredibly promising but shifts into an incoherent mess only to linger onward to a miserable conclusion. Of all the episodes on this list, this is the one that could have easily escaped this fate had they put a tad more work into the ending.
The Gift (Season 3, episode 32) - There was certainly potential here, but it's as if they only had enough material to fill 5 minutes of the running time.
The Last Night of a Jockey (Season 5, episode 5) - I can appreciate the approach, and I did like the miniature set, but nothing makes any sense and the conclusion is moronic.
10. Spur of the Moment (Season 5, episode 21)
We have a time loop, a horseman of the apocalypse-lookalike, and an attempt at a plot twist...yet this episode still falls face first into the ground. The love triangle is presented horribly, and there doesn't appear to be a point to the story. On top of that, the time loop is pointless, unexplained, and the main chick is too stupid to figure out how to change the past even though she knows where her past self will be and how she will react. That's a good one.
9. Mr. Dingle, the Strong (Season 2, Episode 19)
I would have rated this episode lower on the list, however, the story appears to be, at least, slightly self-aware. The comedic elements just don't work due to the overly cornball nature of the plot. The aliens look utterly abysmal and demonstrate TZ's budget limitations. If the resolution weren't so lame, I would have actually forgiven the shortcomings.
8. Sounds and Silences (Season 5, Episode 27)
This episode mostly fails due to not taking the material seriously enough. The background characters serve no purpose, and the main guy is not properly fleshed out. Had the story taken a darker turn you might have sympathized with the main guy or it would have made his comeuppance more satisfying. Instead, we are left with one of the more irrelevant episodes in the entire series.
7. Ninety Years Without Slumbering (Season 5, Episode 12)
Similar to "The Gift," there was, realistically, 5 minutes of material to work with. Unlike "The Gift," however, the general premise of this episode is idiotic. Some old guy thinks he will die if a clock stops? Okaaay...except it's not true, and the old guy is conversing with his own ghost or something? Whaaat? In a nutshell: this plays out like a spitball idea cooked up in the TZ offices that somehow was taken seriously.
6. Come Wander With Me (Season 5, Episode 34)
This is what happens when the TZ writers puff away a little too hard on those Chesterfields. I can appreciate trying to incorporate a musically-themed episode into the mix, but the story is a complete mess. Once again, nothing makes any sense but in an extremely annoying way. The audience is left in the dark with only faint hints as to what the hell is happening.
5. The Mirror (Season 3, episode 6)
I kind of understand what they were trying to convey, but it's all too stupid and pointless. Oh noooo...a magic mirror that might show the future. There is no clarity, and the attempt to depict paranoia fails monumentally. Maybe if this episode were from season 4 it could have worked given the extra running time. On the other hand, that would have probably been a bad idea, because they would have dragged it out to create an even more torturous experience.
4. Black Leather Jackets (Season 5, Episode 18)
What a debacle. The tone is completely off with that goofy music, and why would aliens, covertly trying to take over the world, dress so conspicuously? To make matters worse they add a love story to the mix that occurs over the course of a few hours? Whaaaat? And the final nail in the coffin is the unbelievably rushed and lackluster ending that has absolutely no resolution. My goodness...
3. The Jungle (Season 3, episode 12)
This episode is just bad. On the surface, the idea of a corporate asshole getting his comeuppance after disregarding locals sounds mildly interesting. The execution of that idea is terrible. Cheap sound effects, moments of sheer idiocy, and a pitiful ending cement this as one of the worst. If there were simply more buildup or explanations this could--COULD--have worked.
2. The Hunt (Season 3, episode 19)
I hate this episode. The retardation is palpable during every single second. It's almost like the story is a slightly edgier (yet less funny) episode of "Scooby Doo." I can't get over why TZ thought this would work or how anyone could take this material seriously. The afterlife is just some shitty dirt road in the middle of oblivion? AND you can get tricked into going to hell unless you have a dog with you?! Riiiight. Hey, at least it's not number one on this list, am I right?
And the worst episode in the entire series is...(Drumroll!)
1: The Bewitchin' Pool (Season 5, episode 36)
Well this shouldn't have come as much of a shock--this episode is painful...utterly painful. No other episode could possibly occupy this prestigious position. Besides being the worst episode on a technical front, as well as one of the dumbest stories ever depicted in TZ (or any other fiction for that matter), this episode sours TZ's entire legacy by having (what should be) the honorary position of the series finale. Argh! It frustrates me to no end that this is the bookend to the franchise--the worst fucking episode of them all! Shit audio, horrendous voice dubbing, reused scenes, laughable acting, a creepy pedophile grandma, a ridiculous divorce plot line, and a goddamn hidden world under a swimming pool?! Get the hell out of here! I refuse to ever watch this episode again.
I definitely agree with the bewitchin pool. Worst series finale ever
ReplyDeleteWell, as you can tell, three of his episodes made my list including number 2 and the prestigious number 1 spot...so I can't say I have any love either. However, I do like "Stopover in a Quiet Town."
ReplyDeleteI agree.The Bewitching Pool was THE worst Twilight Zone episode.The girl's dubbed over voice sounded like it came from the Rocky and Bullwinkle show.Repetitive scenes in the beginning.Two kids escaping their misery by essentially drowning themselves in their swimming pool.
ReplyDeleteIt actually was Rocky's (June Foray's) voice. I don't know what the hell TZ's crew or CBS were thinking. The episodes were not filmed in the order that they aired...sooo...that means someone thought this was worthy of being the finale?! What a colossal failure.
DeleteThe Obsolete Man takes it for me
ReplyDeleteWhat?...no way. Watch again and listen to Rod's comment at the end...a lot of truth
DeleteThe Obsolete Man is pretty good...definitely not among the worst one way or another.
DeleteI actually like "Elegy" and "The Arrival," but I absolutely agree with your commentary on every entry on your list. Some should never have been made ("The Hunt" comes to mind), and others have endings that are too rushed and go nowhere.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your input! You are right, "Elegy" and "The Arrival" had potential and are, at least, watchable compared to the others. I actually thought "The Arrival" could have been amazing if it had a better ending to complement the setup. Instead, it's just some drunk guy's imagination!
DeleteThe descent into obscene language is unnecessary and rude. No need for profanity. Just keep it clean.
ReplyDeleteIt's a little late now, Kris.
DeleteThere's always some idiot telling other people how to post or not post.
DeleteAgree..keep it clean folks!
DeleteDidn't realize until I got older for every classic episode TZ had it had some horrible episodes and you have nailed many of them and yes Bewitching Pool deserves it's worst episode spot.
ReplyDeleteHaha yup, I think most can agree The Bewitchin' Pool is the worst. It's hard to argue anything being worse.
DeleteI guess in some ways I have different tastes than some of you, but in other ways, I'm right with you. The episodes that you have on your worst ep list that I completely agree are horrible are Black leather jackets, Sounds and silences, Come wander with me, and The mirror. Those four are horrible. There are a few more TZ eps you don't have on this list that I also hate; To Agnus with love and The mind and the matter were complete stupidass jokes of episodes. I also really didn't like Night of the jocky and The man in the bottle.
ReplyDeleteThe ep you have listed here that I actually like though is The hunt. It's got an interesting story with the woodsman who'd had a simple country life with his wife and faithful dog now realizing and coming to terms with his passing away into the afterlife. The ending when he reaches heaven and is told by the heaven's gatesman that his wife will be along shortly has kind of a feel-good spirit. The bewitching pool definitely has some ugly things about it, I couldn't stand those step parents. But, the part with the kids finding a hidden idylic world could relate to kids who have difficult home lives and miserable step parents and yearn for an escape to a nicer place. These are just my opinions, it's all good whatever anyone else loves or hates though, to each their own.
Yeah, I'm noticed a lot of people coming to the defense of The Hunt. I guess I just cannot see the merits of it. Also, there are plenty of other bad episodes, but I can only pick 10.
DeleteThe voice overs on the kids were also ridiculous in The bewitching pool.
ReplyDeleteThe hunt had sort of an Old yeller quality, without the death and afterlife parts of course. I got these two small add on comments here because I forgot to add them to my main comment.
ReplyDeleteThe hunt had sort of an Old yeller quality, without the death and afterlife parts of course. I got these two small add on comments here because I forgot to add them to my main comment.
ReplyDeleteThe voice overs on the kids were also ridiculous in The bewitching pool.
ReplyDeleteWhat was the deal with giving the kids southern accents when their obnoxious parents did not?
DeleteThere were audio issues in the filming and I think an issue with re-shoots. I forget now all the technical details, but this episode is a complete failure. I'm still trying to figure out why they decided to place it last in airing when a better episode might have made for a final impression to hopefully renew for season 6. Instead, we know what happened.
DeleteAgree...weird voice...Rocky squirrel!!!
DeleteI guess in some ways I have different tastes than some of you, but in other ways, I'm right with you. The episodes that you have on your worst ep list that I completely agree are horrible are Black leather jackets, Sounds and silences, Come wander with me, and The mirror. Those four are horrible. There are a few more TZ eps you don't have on this list that I also hate; To Agnus with love and The mind and the matter were complete stupidass jokes of episodes. I also really didn't like Night of the jocky and The man in the bottle.
ReplyDeleteThe ep you have listed here that I actually like though is The hunt. It's got an interesting story with the woodsman who'd had a simple country life with his wife and faithful dog now realizing and coming to terms with his passing away into the afterlife. The ending when he reaches heaven and is told by the heaven's gatesman that his wife will be along shortly has kind of a feel-good spirit. The bewitching pool definitely has some ugly things about it, I couldn't stand those step parents. But, the part with the kids finding a hidden idylic world could relate to kids who have difficult home lives and miserable step parents and yearn for an escape to a nicer place. These are just my opinions, it's all good whatever anyone else loves or hates though, to each their own.
I really liked Elegy, although the camera work was off a little. Plus the scientific data didn't add up.
ReplyDeleteI agree about the scientific data being off in Elegy. The caretaker says that the three visiting astronauts are the first new people to have visited him in 200 years, yet he also says that his "graveyard" of all those "people statues" or whatever you can call them have been there for just over 200 years themselves. Did the caretaker create that large elaborate "graveyard" in only a couple years? The episode kinda goofed on that one.
ReplyDeleteThe Mirror, Come Wander With Me, Black Leather Jackets, The Jungle, The Gift, Last Night of a Jockey, and Spur of the Moment are all horrible episodes.
ReplyDeleteThe Arrival is meh; certainly not a good episode, but nowhere near as bad as those listed above.
I don't think any of the other episodes you cite here are bad episodes, even though I agree with some of your criticisms of them.
In my opinion, no list of worst TZ episodes would be complete without including that one with Carol Burnett (Cavendar is Coming). IIRC it was intended as a pilot for a TV series featuring Cavendar trying to gain his wings. It just comes across as a lame episode of an earlyy 60s sitcom unconvincing packaged as a TZ episode. They even used a laugh track.
Another bad episodes that come to mind is the one with Elizabeth Montgomery and Charles Bronson ostensibjy as sole survivors of a US-Soviet nuclear war (Bronson playing an American soldier, Montgomery playing a Soviet soldier); it was called "Two".
A couple of other really lame one a they come to mind are the episodes "Big Tall Wish" and "I Am The Night - Color Me Black". Big Tall Wish is notable for its having a predominantly black cast, and features a strong performance by Ivan Dixon, but suffers from a lame and predictable plot.
I Am The Night was a muddled attempt to address social justice issues. The intentions were good but the story is just lame and poorly written.
There were several other stinker episodes in this typically awesome series but I think I've written enough...
I do agree with your assessment about episodes I didn't list. I have an entire mental list of "meh" episodes. TZ has a lot of episodes that are forgettable and stupid as well. I mean, there are episodes that some people don't even know exist since they are almost never aired and for good reason.
DeleteI disagree on Come Wander With me. I think there is supposed to be a meaning to it, that being if you want or desire something too much, perhaps search too far for it, there is possibly an unintended consequence or that it comes at a price you don’t want to pay. The main character was so flamboyant and insistent on getting his hit song, what he got as an outcome was something entirely different.
ReplyDeleteI have no doubt there was supposed to be more meaning to it, but it failed miserably to deliver overall. To each their own though.
DeleteI just watched the Bewtiching Pool for the furst time and I have to agree: terrible acting,nonsensical voice overs, cold parents and lonely, unloved children who create a fantasy world out of despair. Bummer of an episode!
ReplyDeleteYup, and what makes it worse is that it's the de facto series finale in hindsight. It's quite embarrassing really.
DeleteOh my gosh. I am enjoying these lists SO MUCH. Now I have to watch all the episodes and read all your reviews. Hilarious.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your input! Glad you could enjoy the list and get the humor I go for :)
DeleteI love The Hunt it doesn't deserve to be on this list.
ReplyDeleteIt certainly does ;p
DeleteI agree. "Eternity's a powerful long time to go without a coon hunt" -- maybe the funniest line in the whole series. I always enjoy watching it. Just now watching "Stopover in a Quiet Town" -- now THERE is a terrible episode -- awful dialogue (with a ton of misogyny) and even worse acting (Barry Nelson completely overacts; the little girl's laugh is beyond annoying) and direction. I didn't realize this is another Hamner episode, which is funny in light of the originator's comments. His are about as hit-or-miss as you get: can't stand Stopover or a couple of others, but Ring-a-Ding Girl is great, for one.
DeleteOMFG I cannot believe that "Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" is not #1, let alone not even ON this list.
ReplyDeletecouldn't agree more! it's like some pretentious film student trying to make an impression. HORRRRIBLE! should be redacted.
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised no one mentioned "The Fear", with aliens trying to frighten a socialite and a state trooper stuck in a cabin in the woods. Clunky premise, clunky dialogue, stupid effects (Giant fake fingerprints on a car? A fake 500-foot inflatable alien cyclops?), and a laughable closing speech from the actually tiny aliens transmitting the laundry list of their scare tactics and begging their leaders to let them leave before the "giant" humans crush them. A pathetic and uninspired attempt at filling a half hour.
ReplyDeleteWhat about "The Fever"??? Terrible episode.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I really enjoyed Elegy.
ReplyDeleteI hate The Bewitchin' Pool. It makes no sense. I hate the parents. I hate the kids (and their names), I hate Grandma,I hate the acting. They only made it for Mary Badham, because of To Kill a Mockingbird. It's an embarrassment to the entire series.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this list and enjoy the comments. Will purposely watch the bad episode to see everyone's points. What about The Encounter (the "banned" episode), The Fugitive and Lateness of the Hour? I hate those! How about best and worst of the Videotaped episodes?
ReplyDeleteCavender is Coming should be #1. All time worst.
ReplyDeleteHamner wrote 8 episodes for TZ and the are all horrible but I agree with you that this one is the worst of them all
ReplyDeleteI totally disagree with Spur of the Moment being one of the worst. Many people say this, but for me the episode works because everyone always likes the down-to-earth person as compared to the rich stuck up guy. I've always wanted to see a sort of anti-Titanic (meaning the movie) take on a love situation, where the poor, down to earth guy is really not that wonderful either.
ReplyDeleteSignificant agreement from me, though some dissent as well.
ReplyDeleteDisagreements: #'s 10, 9, 4, & 1. Not space to go into the reasons.
My worst episode (honestly almost nauseating): "Cavender Is Coming". Perfectly putrid. Would rather watch paint dry, by far.